Losing Myself (Ch 43)

สวัสดี​ค่ะทุกคน

Time to 'fess up. The angsty email title is actually just a tribute to my first switchoff this past week (yey), in which I spent almost the whole day getting lost and trying to recover from getting lost in a big cycle. As I led my companion through a giant street full of run-down pubs that morning, trying to find a hole in the fence so we could get on to the main road, I knew it was gonna be a great day.

But, for real, it was a great day! I was with an awesome third-transfer sister who's serving in Srinakharin. She's American, her companion is Thai, and they're both fairly new missionaries... Thus the language barrier rears its ugly head. They're so cute about it, though. In their own words: "We talk together all day, even though we have no idea what the other person is saying. We've made it our goal to be happy every day!" 

I mean. Does it get better that? And thus we see that leadership opportunities are really just a chance to learn from others, and serve, and love--and maybe be a listening ear sometimes. I have learned so much since I've been here in Asoke. I'm in the midst of some spiritual giants!

This week has been great. Some highlights: we went to the Bishop's house and he taught me how to make ส้มตำ, which is the Thai papaya salad everyone loves. You have to use a mortar and pestle kind of thing to make it. Everytime I messed up making it (which was often) the Bishop would say, "No no no no no," in really accented English, and then we'd all laugh and I would give it another go. Also, I've realized over time that some kinds of humor don't survive translation, which kind of makes them even better. I asked the Bishop, straight-faced, if he thought forty peppers in the salad would be enough and the entire room went dead silent. Everyone looked at me like I was few bits short of an elephant harness (that's probably not a real expression. You never know, though. I'm not sure if elephants wear harnesses.) And then I told them I was kidding and they laughed courteously and said that if I was going to eat salad with 40 peppers I'd be doing that on my own. Delightful.

Here's a low-light: We got in a taxi cab one day this week and I started asking the taxi driver some questions about his family, his work, his life, etc. After a while, I asked him if he'd ever picked up missionaries before (lots of taxi drivers have). He said, "I knew you were a missionary. You all ask questions first and then try to get us to go to church. You're all the same." Somewhat surprised, I told him I was just trying to get to know him a little bit and asked him if he thought that was a bad thing. He said no, but that I needed to ask more natural questions. He was being really ruthless about it, so I told him sorry but that this was my second language and that what I'd done was the best I had--he could ask me questions in English if he thought that would be better. My companion jumped into the conversation at that point (she'd been doing something else before) and started asking him questions about himself. And here it is: they were the exact same questions, only my companion is Thai. Literally the exact same questions. And the taxi driver told me, "See? This is what a natural conversation looks like." So, yeah, I was ticked for a minute. But it passed. I did my personal study and "frankly forgave (him)" , even though he was a no-good, heathen punk who can't speak English (Kidding! Kidding, I promise. I wish him nothing but happiness and missionary-free taxi rides in the future.)

Switching gears. This week has been full of miracles. I know that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is Christ's true Church here on the earth. Why do I already feel like the members in Asoke are my family, even though I've been here just over a week? They loved me instantly--not because of any particular character virtues I possess, or because of something I did for them--they loved me because they're true disciples of Jesus Christ with real charity in their hearts. They love everyone, as He did. And I love them right back. I guess that's the thing. No worldly institution could produce bonds of love like these--bonds that are both created instantaneously and meant to endure eternally. And they are to be found everywhere throughout the Church--they are one of its defining characteristics. These bonds are made possible through the love of Jesus Christ, which, once again, is found in its most concentrated form in His restored Church. I feel so blessed to be a member and a missionary of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. 

If you feel your testimony of the truthfulness of the gospel is a little weak right now, or half-full, or even hanging by the thread, here's what I'd advise you to do:

1.) pray

2.) read your scriptures

3.) go to church

If you are doing these three things with real intent, you will not fall. You will know God is there, and what He expects of you as a spirit child who has a membership in His kingdom here on earth. If you're not doing these three things with real intent, start today! It might be hard. You might feel like you don't have time, or you're too far gone, or a million other things. But a seed of faith, a particle of a desire to know--that's all it takes. This beautiful, well-beaten formula changes lives. I've seen it over and over again. And, man, I want nothing but the fullest blessings of the gospel for all of you who I love so dearly back home! I love you so much! You mean the world to me. 

Thanks for everything! Have the greatest week ever. 

Sister Harris